2016-17 OSCAR WINNERS:
* Best Foreign Picture: DIVIDE AND CONQUER (English Title: FOR A FISTFUL OF RUBLES)
* Best Director: VLADIMIR PUTIN
* Best Assistant Director: ROBERT MUELLER
* Best Actress: Madam HRC aka ST. HILLARY
* Best Actor: Master DRT aka SIR DEPLORABLE
* Best Screen Play: CHRISTOPHER STEELE
A down ‘n out ex-KGB street fighter rides into this god-forsaken down–on–its–luck town, BackScratchington. What does he see? Dumb and Dumber squaring off against each other. What does he know? There’s profit to be made. What does he do? Makes trouble to make it happen.
And so our Russian ronin set out to set up both Dumb and Dumber. While he set out to discredit them, he got an unexpected bonus – they destroy both themselves and America.
Madame Dumb and the Dumb Party, like the d-kopf’s they are, get to pay for the privilege of “colluding” with Russian government “Roses”, formerly known as “KGB”! They’re Dumbs, so they’re tricked to pay for cavier, but wind up in the cabbage soup of salacious Fake News.
Madame Dumb, plenty experienced in handling dung, dishes out salacious fake news. Not good enough to harm Dumber. But, there are many twists in this plot, so the Dumbs, through cut-outs, next pass the info to the FBI; and then to the media, “forcing” the FBI to act.
Dumber, showing he’s dumber, dishes out facts rather than fakes. He points to Dumb’s husband getting $135 million from the Director while Dumb gives him effective control of American uranium. But since Caesar’s wife is cast by the media as above suspicion of selling off her casting couch ,the CIA, controlled by the Dumb Party, ignores the facts.
The Dumbs then let out a hue and a cry (miming Casablanca’s Captain Reynault) : “We’re shocked…shocked to find Collusion with Russian government agents going on by Dumber.” (On the QT, Fusion hands Dumb and Dumb Party the bill for their own colluding with the Russian government. The Dumbs [sotto voce]”oh, thank you very much – but keep it secret.”)
And the rest, as they say, is death and destruction.
Dumber learns the FBI hid that the info was paid by and came from the Dumbs; and that secret passing of KGB fake news leads the FBI to investigating him! So what does Dumber do? Shoots himself in the foot, natch. He fires MACcomey the Knife. And gets? An ex-FBI asst. director to follow Director Putin’s set-up shots.
So now, Dumber is effectively hog-tied by Washington Lilliputians; and about to be drawn and quartered. Dumb is exposed as a Russian collaborator who got taken for an expensive ride.
So, Dumb and Dumber had a great fall and lived dumbly ever after.
But we, the People, have to put the pieces together again –
so let’s drop the war created by the Russian Puppet Master –
and become united as Smart and Smarter.